Reply to Are you a slow burn?

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[quote=Anonymous]If people are pushing me into a corner or being unfair, I usually recognize it and deal with it then. If I'm angry, I identify the feeling and try to deal with it and speak my piece. I have no issues with debate, confrontation, or disagreement, or standing up for myself. But I think that's a combination of personality type (fierce!) and having grown up with fierce parents who also spent a lot of time having lively debates with me. You had to be pleasant and respectful, but you could argue and disagree.

I know a lot of people are very uncomfortable with this kind of thing, though. As long as you do step back and sort out your feelings, and then get back to the people to deal with things, it's a positive thing. No one is ultimately steamrolling you. You just take your stand in your own time and with preparation.

If you grew up with parents that invalidated your feelings, making you feel it was wrong to get angry, or didn't allow you to stand up and disagree, then it can be a lot harder as an adult to speak up. My husband's like this, and for years he would just agree with anything and also lie, because he was taught that you have to appear to agree and go along with people. He's been working on unlearning this.[/quote]

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