Reply to Is it fair to be mad at someone for being mad at you

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Reply to "Is it fair to be mad at someone for being mad at you"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]No.  This is passive aggressive and immature and basically is deflecting the issue by creating rage.  However, I wonder whether Mad Person #1 has good communication skills.  Is Mad Person #1 communicating an issue or becoming enraged? It's hard to respond to a very angry person.  Stop being angry and start communicating.[/quote]

Agreed, in large part. It is absolutely immature, and possibly passive-aggressive, to respond to someone's complaint/frustration/anger by making it all about you and demanding they address your feelings. That is a deflection, defined.

However, I disagree somewhat with the last part of your post, which reads as a tone argument. Yes, sure, if you can say it politely, that can sometimes help. That said, the sort of person who would make your feelings into a discussion about their reactions is likely to do so regardless of how nicely/gently/politely you word your feelings (ask me how I know). We should all strive for civil communication, but sometimes we're angry. Telling the angry, aggrieved party to pretty it up so their aggressor doesn't have a fit is walking the path to victim blaming, IMO.[/quote]

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