Reply to My sister is quitting her job to care for my mother

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. Great ideas. They dont have pea pod in their area but I might call around a try and find some sort of food delivery option. I could have one load dropped off at my moms and another one at her house.  Cleaning service is another good idea. My mom has one but not sure is SIL does.  Keep the ideas coming.  As for going on a vacation I think that sounds ideal and will try and get with other sibs and make that work.  She doesn't have children, which is another reason I feel bad.  I feel like she kinda felt she had to do it since the rest of us are raising our kids. I dont want it to seem like her free time is less valuable because she is child free. [/quote]

Tread this very lightly.  I would not be ok with you doing a cleaning service in my home.  I think its great others do it, but I would not want someone in my home/personal space.  Same goes with food, it would be uncomfortable for me.  Honestly, calling and seeing how she is, calling mom and visiting and while you visiting take over the daily care are the best things you can do.  Money does not solve its a difficult situation in this case and your sister wants to do it or feels obligated, so let her.  It isn't about having kids or not.  She is the only one stepping up to do it.    Offering her money, food, vacations is not the way to go.  If anything, have your mom change the will so sister is left slightly more of the share for caring for mom as an appreciation.  Your sister has already declined money.  While the other posters are well intentioned, it puts her is an uncomfortable situation to decline.  Your helping - time is far more important.[/quote]

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