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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]She is much younger than me (same parents, but just a very large age gap), and she just learned that her "boyfriend" of one month is married and has a young child.  Essentially, the guy's wife saw the texts between her husband and my sister and called him out on it and then she called my sister and told her that the man she has been seeing actually has a family and she asked that my sister please leave them alone.  My sister was initially disgusted, felt betrayed, and was saddened but, since then, the guy has called her on his work phone and "apologized" and said that his wife is a horrible person and he's moving out and my sister is the love of his life and he can't live without her.  I initially felt bad for my sister but since that conversation with him, she is now saying things like, well, if he does move out, I guess I can talk to him and his wife is so terrible and blah blah blah.

I'm so disgusted by her right now.  She has known this guy for ONE MONTH.  I don't care what type of connection they have.  He is married and has a young child.  It's just so appalling.  I can't even be near her.  She sees me (same age as this man's wife) with my husband and my young child and the fact that she can even take this man's calls now knowing that he has a family is just so abhorrent to me.  [b]It just shows a total lack of self-respect on her part that she is even entertaining the thought of talking to someone who lied so much to her and who is, undoubtedly, going to do the very same thing to her eventually. [/b] To me, this would all be such a turn off.  Not only that the man is married with a kid, but also that he is so willing to just abandon them at the drop of a hat because of a one month young relationship with some girl.

I don't know what to do.  I don't know whether I should try to talk some sense into her to get her to forget about this guy and move on or whether I should completely just wash my hands of it.  I've already told her everything I wrote in the paragraph above.  I asked her how she would feel if someone did that to me or to our mother or to her when she was older and married and had a child.  I told her karma was a bitch and she'd be punished a thousand times over if she continued a relationship with this man knowing that he has a family.  I just don't know what to do.[/quote]

How old is she?  She may still be at the age where she thinks she is "special".  Yes, WE realize that she is getting played, and that the whole "my wife is crazy/mean/horrible/etc" is typical.  You have said your piece.  Don't let this kill your relationship.

Many, MANY women have been in her shoes, and realized later how unbelievable STUPID it was.  She doesn't really need you piling on, telling her she is shitty.  I know you can look from the outside and see how ridiculous this is - but this is a part of growing up for some people.  I bet she is thinking that he looooooooves her - he is willing to leave his *wife* for her!  His terrible, awful, no-good wife!  [/quote]

+1  your sister is naive and young.   She just got dumped in a horrible way (finding out he is married) and now there's a chance she won't be dumped and humiliated (him calling her and trying to "fix it").  Look, we all know how this ends, but your sister might have to learn this lesson on her own.  Don't ruin your relationship with her because she is young and struggling.  For her, the wife/child is an abstract.   [/quote]

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