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[quote=Anonymous]My wife had a life threatening event, which could have killed her (it has a high mortality rate). She was in the ICU and spent three weeks in the hospital. She's home, but still sick. It's going to be months before there is a full recovery.

We have a 1 and 3 year old. It has been devastating.

The thing that is burning me up is that her family has pretty much behaved like this isn't a big deal. They don't call to check in on her. They sort of sat silent while I explained how serious things were and that she was in the ICU. No one reached out to me for support beyond asking if there was anything they could do -- in a way that made it clear that it was more of a gesture than a genuine question (they live hours away).

My parents are dead and my sister actually took FMLA to help me with the kids. It's been brutal, but we are going into the holiday season and I received a text from my wife's brother's wife (my SIL) with a Christmas wish list for her kids. I threw my phone because I was so pissed (yes, I am scheduled to visit a therapist to process this whole thing).

I just don't get it. I don't get how we can all pretend everything is fine and just act as though my wife had a small issue like food poisoning (my MIL described it like this in a group email). I just don't get it.

My in-laws were always surface kind of people. Nice and I liked them, but I just am confused over how hard they work to keep things superficial and light. My life is neither right now.

So, now that I have a new phone (my old phone was years old so throwing it was both cathartic and practical), I am trying to navigate the holidays. We are keeping things small here. I am sending gift cards but leaving it at that. I just want to vent a bit before getting the kids from daycare. Thanks.[/quote]

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