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[quote=Anonymous]First, I don't necessarily think your wife is depressed or something is wrong psychologically with her.  A lot of women would go without sex in long term relationships if given the choice.  It's a politically incorrect truth (not all women, of course).  This article may make you feel better or worse, depending if you are taking it personally http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2007/03/not-tonight-dear/305643/

That being said, you first need to have a very blunt talk.  Tell her you want to have more sex with her and that the lack of it is eroding your marriage. I wouldn't bring up that she has gotten fat - she knows it.  Let her tell you that her body image is holding her back - and then you can (genuinely) offer to do what it takes to let her get back in reasonable shape.  (For us, when we were sliding into poor shape, my wife and I made a committment to support each other going to the gym, even if it meant one of us was solo bed time).

You will end up cheating and/or divorced or incredible bitter (probably all three) unless you figure this out together.[/quote]

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