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[quote=Anonymous]My DH is one of four siblings and two of them like to suggest group gifts for their parents or each other for birthdays and holidays. I have never liked the practice because I like picking out gifts for people and I think their family tends to go over board with the gift amounts but we have always gone along in the past. In the last few years, there has come to be a big disparity in income between the siblings. We make the most by a lot, but all of the siblings are comfortable. Recently, when a gift idea is proposed (usually by one brother or his wife who are the most on top of these things) and the siblings have all agreed, they say to let them know how much each person is going to contribute without giving us the cost. We assumed that the cost would be split four ways and we would pay a quarter, but it seems to be assumed that we will pay the biggest share, another brother will pay more as well, and the other two will pay less. This does roughly map onto the income/family size ratio of the siblings but I'm still bothered by it. I feel like it turns gift giving into a financial transaction and assumes that we will float the cost of big gifts that we didn't even pick out ourselves and don't really want to give. For context, we don't give big gifts to each other or to my parents or sister because gift giving is not a big part of my family's dynamic. In my family, gifts are really only given to children.

How do others with big income disparities divvy up costs among siblings? Should it be split equally or based on overall wealth. [/quote]

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