Reply to DD weight gain, part two

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Reply to "DD weight gain, part two "

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[quote=Anonymous]I think you need to worry much more about the act that your healthy daughter will not wear a bathing suit in summer than about the 20 pounds.  Somehow she has learned to hate the body she is in, or to think that 20 pounds makes her a pariah that must be hidden.

Encourage her, tell her she is beautiful, get her out, make sure you are not reinforcing your own fat phobia with her.  Body shame like this at 14 can lead to much worse problems than 20 extra pounds.  (I thought I was fat and horrific at 140 pounds in high school at 5'7".  My mom made me feel awful, talked about Weight wWatchers, lots of talk about how hard it is to lose weight once you're older.  Lots of shame.  I carried it, hid myself, and just got bigger and sadder and more ostracized.)

Her shape has changed just a small bit.  Your reaction can't be helping.  Bring HER back.  Her shape will never be what it was when she was your little skinny girl - she's a woman now.  And maybe will be a bigger woman.  But don't diminish her.[/quote]

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