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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]10:03, my FIL is here from another country for four months!

OP, I think what you said to your mother-in-law was fine, but maybe your tone was sharper than it could be going forward. I totally get the reaching your limit and then being exasperated. But you can make your point and just try to say it a tiny bit more calmly; maybe sooner than the 10th time your MIL repeats a criticism. Your DH needs to be more understanding about how much repeated criticism from his mother he can expect other people to stomach.  You should feel free to politely pushback as much as needed, and also think about what PP said regarding mental faculties.  Maybe your mother-in-law really forgets that she repeats herself over and over.[/quote]

Yes, my tone was definitely sharp and I do regret that. I think she remembers what she said - she is a sharp cookie and gives no indication that her faculties are starting to loosen. She just has a habit of being pushy and won't let things go, even in the same conversation. It's always been like that with her. Once my husband and I were going to help her move, and as it turned out, when the time came, only my husband was going to help her because I needed to study over the weekend (I was a phd student at the time, and it was a small move as she lived in a furnished apartment). She kept pushing me to help her move instead, because she just knew that I would be able to reorganize my schedule and get my studying done. That was another time I snapped - how many times can one repeat "no, I need to study" politely in one conversation?!

She used to live abroad and visit for a month at a time. Then she moved back to the US, and that ended, thankfully! At least I don't have to deal with this for months at a time anymore. Thank you for that perspective! 
 [/quote]

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