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[quote=Anonymous]I have a son who was ostrasized and bullied in ES.  He is on the mild end of the Autism spectrum and never qualifed for an IEP or 504  (think a cross between Leonard and Sheldon on Big Bang).

We ended up transfering him to a different ES in 6th grade.  If I had thought of it prior, I would have done it one or two years earlier.  What worked for us, and it was/is a very long slow slog was to have him go to an on going weekly social skills group from mid 4th grade to start of 12th grade.  At first it was the only place where he could go where kids looked forward to seing himk and he them.  He learned some better social skills and matured along the way.  Monthly parent group helped me and my DH develop better skills as parents and gave us ideas to look beyond school for his social things.  Playing an instrument is a great way to particpate in a social group.  DC was in scouts and when he moved from cub scouts to Boy Scouts we switched troops and found a more inclusive group.  Our Congregation has been the best for him, he has really clicked with the youth group and goes on quarterly weekend events for youth in the mid-atlantic region.  There are many inclusive Congregations for all religious stripes.   Putting DC in several groups where he had to be social was important, picking those that were inclusive was vital.  He is now a senior and will graduate next year and will go to school in the mid-west.

Small steps, small goals add up over time.  ES and MS were the worst, HS has been much better.

Good luck to you.  It is hard.  
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