Reply to How do you learn to accept the family relationships you have instead of the ones you wish you did?

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Reply to "How do you learn to accept the family relationships you have instead of the ones you wish you did?"

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[quote=Anonymous]By accepting that you cannot control other people, only yourself.

I have hardly any relationship at all with my younger sister and father who live 1000 miles away.  Both are difficult and I have accepted that they are who they are and that the physical, mental and emotional distance is a blessing.  Contact is limited and that is okay.

My mother is never going to be an involved grandparent.  She had a shitty role model in my grandparents and, after many years of raising kids on her own, has reverted to a kind of narcissistic teenage phase.  She spends her time traveling with her boyfriend, and working a mindless part time job for supplemental income.  She was a strong role model for me growing up in many ways and I've come to the conclusion t hat its hard to begrudge her this phase of her life.

I have a wonderful husband and son, a great job, a great house and friends whose acceptance, wisdom and love is an amazing gift.  I focus on people with whom I can have a close relationship, whether it is biological or not.  Shared DNA is not a guarantee of love, acceptance or support.  [/quote]

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