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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I picked bad choices for me, all of my 20s and half of my 30s.   I didn't marry, but i had several 4-5 year long relationships.  I will say they each got better, but never good enough to truly have a life-long relationship/marriage with.

So I figured it was me.  Why was I picking men who weren't ready for committment, love, honesty, reliability?  I spend two years in therapy working through that, and NOT dating.   When I felt healthy again, I started dating again, and immediately scratched off people with issues.   Anyone who told me he had trust issues from cheating, etc., he'd immediately be out the door.  Because he's not ready to date in a healthy way, much less marry in a healthy way.  Do not sign on to someone with emotional baggage.   Don't try to rescue someone.  Or change them.  Find someone who's happy with life and has an outlook that most people are generally good and trustworthy.   Not perfect, mind you, but good.

I've been hurt a million times and HORRIBLY from intimate relationships.   HORRIBLY.  But when you finally work through it, the pain is gone.    It really is.   I don't think about any of it anymore, except when posting to DCUM.  ;)  [/quote]

Thank you PP.

Maybe that is the problem. I was giving people a chance that openly expressed issues with trust and relationships.[/quote]

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