Reply to Sister and I can't get along dividing moms wedding set after she passed away. Need advice.

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[quote=Anonymous]I love and miss my mom very much.  She passed away from Alzheimer's about four years ago. I took care of her for five years then my sister took her for 18 months. My mom passed while in my sisters care, so my sister has her wedding set, which is something mom wore every day and is very sentimental.

It was made with three diamonds, one was my grandmothers and the other two my dad purchased.  My sister removed one diamond, my grandmothers, and sent it to me, but kept the other two for herself.

We discovered in moms papers that she wanted whichever daughter that received one, to be given a sum to purchase a similar quality so each would have two.  It meets the criteria for a holographic addendum to her will.

My sister handled the estate, and never honored that wish.

Now my brother sent me this email:  can you give me mom & dad's coin collection so I can get it valued and sold to divide the money among the three of us?

The coin collection is a few old silver dollars and pennies, probably worth $130 total, based on looking up coins and values on the Internet.

Oh, and while my sister took my mom, she charged mom $3000 per month.  I never asked for anything to care for my mom.

I don't feel good about any of this, I feel like my sister sold me out, and I don't feel like the relationship is salvageable.  My sister and I are mutually not speaking.

Four questions:

1. Can the relationships be saved or do I have to give up trying to be treated fairly?  
2.  Why do I have to give up being treated fairly to save the relationship?  
3.  How do we solve the wedding set dilemma at this point?
4.  How do I respond to my brothers email when I feel like my issue with my mothers wedding set is being ignored when I've brought it up to both of them and I feel the coin collection is worthless.  I would send them both $130 to be done with it.[/quote]

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