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[quote=Anonymous]Seriously, this is not healthy. Yes, I have anxiety and depression and ADHD, but I manage to live my life functionally and relatively sanely with the aid of meditation tapes, surrounding myself with good people, and working at it every day. So before you decide I'm a trainwreck (I guess I'm kind of a trainwreck) let me just say: I have a job, I pay my bills, I have friends, etc.

But whenever I think I make a faux pas (a stupid joke, reacting inappropriately, talking a little too loudly - whatever) my cheeks grow hot and I cringe and become extremely self-conscious about the disaster that I've done to people's perceptions of me. If I send a text to friend or boyfriend, I secretly start getting worried if I don't hear back from them within 10 minutes ("Do they think what I just wrote is stupid? Oh god now they hate me, great.") although I've never told anyone this, ever. But when they finally text me back and it's a positive response that doesn't indicate whatsoever that they hate me or think I'm stupid, relief and joy washes over me. I also overthink everything and replay conversations in my head repeatedly.

Why yes, my self-esteem is pretty low, why do you ask?

I just don't know how to stop being like this but it's driving me mad. I did read a profile for Highly Sensitive Person (apparently this is a real thing) and I related to almost every "trait" listed on it, so I guess I am wired this way at least partly. Which is some comfort. But I also need to conquer this if I want to live with any peace of mind.

Advice, suggestions, hate comments all welcome.[/quote]

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