Reply to Twice the in laws

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "Twice the in laws"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My husband's parents are divorced and both remarried.  One set of in laws lives in state, another moved out of state. My parents live on the other side of the country, but [b]I[/b] wish they were closer.  Let's just say my MIL is [b]not my cup of tea[/b] and my step MIL, while pleasant, is a [b]compulsive gifter[/b] so [b]I don't like[/b] spending holidays with either set of ILs.  [b]I don't really like[/b] travelling with small kids to where my parents live because it takes like 12 hours to get there and doing it during the holidays and winter time is [b]exhausting[/b], not to mention the jet lag. [b]I'd rather[b] see my family another time of year when the weather is better.  [/b]I don't like [b] travelling for Thanksgiving either since it's [/b]too crowded,[b] and [/b]too short[b] of a break.  [/b]I don't like[b] the climate most of the year where one set of in laws live.  [/b]I [b]know we need to visit our relatives, and [/b]I [b]want to visit mine, but we don't even go on our own vacations because of being [/b]stuck in baby mode[b] for the past several years.  The kids are finally getting bigger to where travel would be easier. How do [/b]I [b]break out of this [/b]stagnation[b] and have a routine of visiting everyone on some sort of rotational basis without having to travel by plane too much?  Frankly [/b]I'm tired[b] of seeing the ILs since [/b]I don't[b] see my own family often enough, but then my husband claims he wants to see his family even though his relationship with his mother is covertly hostile.  [/b]I [b]feel like because of his parents's divorce, there are just too many ILs to visit that [/b]I'm not that motivated[b] to see. [/b]I [b]feel guilty about it but on the other hand, blood is thicker than water.  How much [/b]effort[b] do [/b]I[b] need to put into visiting the ILs? [/b]I haven't[b] even seen my own sister in 2 years because she doesn't visit, so I don't feel my MIL has a right to complain too much that we haven't visited them since they moved out of state.  [/b]I think part of the issue is I just feel weird being around divorced and remarried ILs since my own parents are not divorced.[b][/quote]

Very negative and all about you.  You even refer to your children in the third person.  The last part is telling.  People divorce all the time and have no reflection on you, your spouse or your parents.  I suggest you find a really good counselor to help you piece out what you can and cannot do and what you are willing to do and to set the boundaries you are able to do.  You also need to talk with your spouse and figure out a game plan for the next few years.  [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics