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[quote=Anonymous]Need to vent.  Never heard of anyone else in this situation.  My ILs have been married 45 years.  They live nearby.  Both retired (young) and are active and both in good physical health.  They are codependent.  FIL takes a special cross country trip with college friends maybe once a year, leaving MIL at home, alone.  FIL also tends to an ailing sibling a few times a year and prefers to travel and visit solo.

My MIL can't stay at her house alone, at all, without her DH.  She becomes phobic and unhinged.  So, a few times a year, she frantically lines up local family members and demands that either they stay with her or she's coming there.  We've hosted her three times in as many years and I told my DH that we'll never, ever do this again.  We haven't been asked, but likely soon will.  I feel like we're indulging her fears and enabling her, rather than seeking some better solutions.  I also worry that as time marches on, she'll be worse, especially if FIL has a health problem or worse.  My take is she needs therapy, not more coddling.  [/quote]

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