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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I"m sorry, OP. I say, "My mother has the relationship with me that she chose" or "I envy those with good relationships with their mom" or "We've tried but this is where we are." Maybe it's that you're talking to someone close to you who wants to help solve what they see as a problem? So for me, I close that door (my relationship w my mom is not a problem) and then steer the conversation away. I follow with, "How's your mom?" or "My daughter and I ..." or "My kids and I ..." to move towards talking about good relationships. [/quote]

OP here, I like that response.  Thank you.  And I agree with the PP who gets mad when people call her heartless.  The people who say that to me have amazing mothers who are "normal".  If you didn't live it there is just no way to understand it.  I don't feel guilty.  Thanks all :) [b] I do envy people with great mothers, it makes me jealous and sometimes I cry just thinking about it.[/quote][/b]

PP, I'm so sorry.  I cry over this loss as well.  I want to find a way to make peace with it but haven't yet.[/quote]

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