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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Just started trying to woo an incredibly awesome man in my social circle, and then encountered his most recent ex-girlfriend at a party. I am completely intimidated, she is the kind of girl who would be the protagonist in a YA novel. We are all in our late twenties.

Let's go through her insane list of attributes:

- amazing body, very physically fit
- all natural beauty (relaxed and lovely and natural, not high maintenance or fake)
- incredibly nice person
- witty
- as well-read as I am or even better-read
- went to HYP
- very good job
- very cultured
- amazing amateur pastry chef and cook
- has a microbrewery in her home
- very good flirt
- very socially popular
- comes from a rich family
- has an adorable and enviable life, [b]as shown by her Instagram[/b]
[b]- life of the party
[/b]- someone any girl (including me if I wasn't so jealous) would want to be friends with, and any man would want to date  : /

I have spent Sunday eating cake, drinking wine and being disheartened. I don't have a chance with the object of my affection.  :( I found out the only reason they broke up was because she found someone else.  :([/quote]

Those are the two reasons my husband would probably be completely irritated by this woman.  He hates people who post their lives on instagram -- moreso if they're "adorable."  And he usually likes the cynic more than the life of the party.

What's my point?  Well, my point is eventually you'll find a guy who likes you for you, and likely, it will be the things you think make you imperfect that attracts him to you.  When I was in high school, I thought guys liked the perfect, popular girls.  But when I was older and had more dating experience under my belt, I realized that there are lots of different kind of guys out there.  And not all of them like the picture-perfect, enviable girls.  In fact, a lot of them are attracted to certain quirks or flaws or things that make someone imperfectly original.

Mark Twain or Roosevelt or someone said "Comparison is the death of joy."  And that statement is true.  Stop comparing yourself to this woman.  Maybe the object of your affection will like something about you that you think makes you imperfect.  Or maybe the "object of your affection" isn't right for you.

I have to say that it sounds weird that you are pursuing him.  A guy friend once told me that if a woman has to pursue a man, then the man isn't really into her.  I actually think that applies to men, too (that if a man has to pursue a woman, she probably isn't really into him and maybe ends up dating him until someone else comes along).  Don't be a consolation prize.  If you have been around this guy for a while and he's given no subtle clues that he is interested in you, then you need to move on.

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