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[quote=Anonymous]I do try.  I try to go along to get along.  I try to be kind.  Sometimes, people take it the wrong way if you are kind, and they try to take advantage.  My big issue with my IL's is that they want their way, and they are not very supportive.  They say they are, yet when push comes to shove, they are not the ones you want on your side.  They are not the loyal type with anyone but themselves.

Do they try?  I think so, superficially.  It used to make me sad, so now I just go along to get along, as I mentioned.  Their traits that I object to, like making certain things "about me (them)" - I try not to do.

My IL's can be very insular, and are not ones to talk about what they did not like about their family; they seem to sugarcoat a lot, even if they don't mean to.  So, I try to come at things from different perspectives.  For example, laugh at my own families' imperfections.

Yet, if I bring certain things up, they are not the type to want to hear more, so connecting with them is difficult.  I get it, we don't have much in common, just try sometimes.  I hope I do, at least.

So to answer your question OP, I think I am a good IL, but my differences are not a personal affront.  So I try to remember that, too.

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