Reply to Help me come to terms with MIL

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "Help me come to terms with MIL"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Figuring out the reason is not going to help you handle it.  Bad behavior is bad behavior no matter what, and your MIL's psychological issues are hers to figure out how to handle.

Be kind, but don't go overboard.  You will likely never have a good, easy relationship with her.  Maintain reasonable boundaries so you can have a relationship with her at all.[/quote]

I actually disagree with the first part.  Sometimes figuring out why people act in an unpleasant manner goes a long way towards feeling empathy for them, which in turn helps you deal with them.  It doesn't solve the problem, bc they will still act like a pill, but knowing why can help you avoid triggers that make it worse.  Just because you understand where the bad manners come from doesn't excuse them, you still need boundaries.  But it might help with the urge you feel to avoid this person entirely.  Set boundaries, enforce, tolerate her with a bit of empathy.

My MIL is tough too, and I spend a lot of time trying to figure out why.  I will probably never totally understand it and that's ok.  But it does help me see her as a person who just wants to be loved, even if she's a pain in the ass.  [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics