Reply to My MIL is just awful to be with, but DH wants her to be part of our family life

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[quote=Anonymous]I am married to this nice, generous, handsome man who I love, and we have 3 kids (13, 11, and 8). His father is dead, and his mother (my MIL) is currently 72 and living alone nearby.

Thing is, I absolutely despise this women. She is just awful to be around, and has a really grating personality. A few weeks ago, me and her brought the youngest two to the Air and Space museam just as a treat, and she would point out kids who were overweight and loudly comment on how unhealthy/ fat they were, with my DS and DD right there, listening (they are not overweight, I just think it is a bad example). I know for a fact several of these kids heard her comments, as they looked at us or reacted to it. I've never liked the women, but this was really just a breaking point.

The big problem is that whenever I say anything negative about the women, I get completely shut down. Apparently, before retiring, she had a long career in working with the homeless in DC, and before that worked abroad in the Middle East as a nurse and public health worker, which is what my husband always remarks on. If I talk to anyone who knows her (mostly my husband's friends who he grew up with) they are completely taken aback, and call her a saint because of what she dedicated her life to. Suddenly I am the bad person for disliking this women, who yes did a lot of good for a job, for being a complete jackass. It has gotten to the point where I do not want her around my kids, and I don't want to put on a smile and pretend to like her. Of course my DH thinks I've too harsh with her, and says that while she can be a bit insensitive, she deserves to have a relationship with her grandkids.

What should I do?  [/quote]

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