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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think I'd say something like "holding Baby can't be good for your arthritis, especially since Baby is growing so much recently!" Then find a way to seat baby so grandma can interact easily (a high chair?) and make that the default. You didn't say how young the baby is, but I'm guessing only a few months? Soon, Baby can "prefer to lie on a mat" or "want to be free to sit on the floor."

I'll also point out that kids don't need to be babysat by their grandparents to feel close to them. Heck, they don't even need physical contact! You are not damaging their relationship if you set reasonable boundaries based on your MIL's physical limits. (Of course, you don't have to say why she's not babysitting unless you want to. You can just choose not to have her babysit.)[/quote]

If I made a comment about her arthritis I can only imagine the quickness with which she would snap at me that her arthritis is fine.  She also makes these comments talking about how light DD is, her intended implication being "I have no problem holding her" even though it's really obvious that she does.

Thank you for reminding me about not needing to be babysat!  Especially when this young, right?  I can see wanting some alone time when DD is like, 5 or 6... but she isn't going to remember any of this.  We have staved off her requests to babysit for a long time, and at some point we will either need to be straight with her or do what DH's brother does, which is have her "co babysit" with the other grandma.[/quote]

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