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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Maybe she wanted that old address to have paperwork sent there knowing that you wouldn't get it. 
I think that how you proceed depends on how you want your relationship with your mom to proceed. If you bring it up, you are basically accusing her of lying and stealing. [/quote]

OP here. This is what I'm now wondering as she was so aggressive about using the old address. The situation is so damn dicey. It's an uncomfortable topic to bring up but with my mother's classic "I know better than everyone else" attitude I wouldn't be surprised if she is withholding it or somehow convinced my grandmother to redo her will before she died.  If she did get her to redo it, then so be it, I don't have a leg to stand on and that's life.

Otherwise, I don't even actually "need" the money-- DH and I are fine but if it is a good amount it would be nice to have in terms of having funds for things like a good preschool for DC or to invest for college. At the crux of it all if I were a grandmother and my son or daughter refused to give a grandchild (who was a decent, law-abiding human being) say, $10K I had left him or her because they have a personal issue with GC that I have nothing to do with, I'd probably be spinning in my grave.  My mother and grandmother were close but my grandmother in no way saw her daughter as the most perfect human being (based on things she said and arguments I witnessed). [/quote]

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