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[quote=Anonymous]OP, have you tried talking to DH about this when the two of you are alone and more relaxed? My husband had many of the same annoying tendencies when our kids were little. My mentioning it in the moment only made me look like the controlling b**ch and did nothing to help.

I decided to talk to him over our rare dinner out sans kids and said something like: "Look, I know it is hard coming home from work and dealing with the kids and house, but I really count on you for help. How about I give you 30 minutes to unwind and then you pitch in with some stuff for a while? Also, I know that I can be a tad controlling about how and when things get done, so I'll try to back off. By the same token, there are certain things that are non-negotiable, such as the kids' bedtimes. When you let Larla stay up late it just makes her and the rest of us miserable the next day, so it can't happen except in an emergency. Can you try to respect that and I'll try not to nag you so much?

Believe it or not, DH was better after our talk. Not perfect, but better. As a bonus, I felt less annoyed and less like the police cop of the household.[/quote]

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