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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Respectfully, this is between SIL and BIL; only your DH is even related to SIL, so let DH handle it. Step back.[/quote]

I've got to disagree.  What the OP is describing is abuse, and every citizen who witnesses child abuse, or knows of child abuse has a responsibility to stop it.

OP, I would tell your BIL that what he describes is child abuse, and that you feel an obligation to either intervene or call CPS and let them intervene.  There are several options here.  He could leave and take the baby to your house until his wife gets help.  He could send the baby to you or grandparents.  His wife could seek inpatient care or move out while she receives outpatient intervention.  They could make an agreement that she's not alone with the baby (he does all the wake ups, there's a nanny, or a relative if she's not there with specific instructions on what to do if a situation escalates).  I'd also let him know that you know this is hard, and that you'll support him however you can, but that if he can't take one of those steps you need to involve CPS.

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