Anonymous
Post 05/16/2014 20:26     Subject: SIL hit niece
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Baby could die from a head injury.

Are you in a position to care for the child?


What would that matter? The baby is not her responsibility and the SIL probably doesn't want her anywhere near her baby.


Abused children are society's responsibility.

I ask because family might be better than a random foster home.
Anonymous
Post 05/16/2014 20:26     Subject: SIL hit niece
You absolutely have to do something -- no matter who the baby is, you are obligated IMO. But I would not call CPS. I would tell your SIL and her DH that if she does not agree to go into counseling then you will be forced to call the police. You can't wait until this baby gets brain damage or worse. Call them now.
Anonymous
Post 05/16/2014 20:19     Subject: SIL hit niece
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Respectfully, this is between SIL and BIL; only your DH is even related to SIL, so let DH handle it. Step back.


I've got to disagree. What the OP is describing is abuse, and every citizen who witnesses child abuse, or knows of child abuse has a responsibility to stop it.

OP, I would tell your BIL that what he describes is child abuse, and that you feel an obligation to either intervene or call CPS and let them intervene. There are several options here. He could leave and take the baby to your house until his wife gets help. He could send the baby to you or grandparents. His wife could seek inpatient care or move out while she receives outpatient intervention. They could make an agreement that she's not alone with the baby (he does all the wake ups, there's a nanny, or a relative if she's not there with specific instructions on what to do if a situation escalates). I'd also let him know that you know this is hard, and that you'll support him however you can, but that if he can't take one of those steps you need to involve CPS.



This.


+2

And do this immediately.
Anonymous
Post 05/16/2014 19:53     Subject: SIL hit niece
Anonymous wrote:Baby could die from a head injury.

Are you in a position to care for the child?


What would that matter? The baby is not her responsibility and the SIL probably doesn't want her anywhere near her baby.
Anonymous
Post 05/16/2014 19:45     Subject: SIL hit niece
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Respectfully, this is between SIL and BIL; only your DH is even related to SIL, so let DH handle it. Step back.


I've got to disagree. What the OP is describing is abuse, and every citizen who witnesses child abuse, or knows of child abuse has a responsibility to stop it.

OP, I would tell your BIL that what he describes is child abuse, and that you feel an obligation to either intervene or call CPS and let them intervene. There are several options here. He could leave and take the baby to your house until his wife gets help. He could send the baby to you or grandparents. His wife could seek inpatient care or move out while she receives outpatient intervention. They could make an agreement that she's not alone with the baby (he does all the wake ups, there's a nanny, or a relative if she's not there with specific instructions on what to do if a situation escalates). I'd also let him know that you know this is hard, and that you'll support him however you can, but that if he can't take one of those steps you need to involve CPS.



This.
Anonymous
Post 05/16/2014 19:40     Subject: SIL hit niece
OP,
This is literally a matter of life or death. You must do something. Intervene, get that baby away from his mother and get the mother to the hospital. Get DH to start persuading BIL to act. This weekend. Apologies are meaningless. She is sick and needs attention. The baby needs protection.
Anonymous
Post 05/16/2014 19:38     Subject: SIL hit niece
Anonymous wrote:Respectfully, this is between SIL and BIL; only your DH is even related to SIL, so let DH handle it. Step back.


I've got to disagree. What the OP is describing is abuse, and every citizen who witnesses child abuse, or knows of child abuse has a responsibility to stop it.

OP, I would tell your BIL that what he describes is child abuse, and that you feel an obligation to either intervene or call CPS and let them intervene. There are several options here. He could leave and take the baby to your house until his wife gets help. He could send the baby to you or grandparents. His wife could seek inpatient care or move out while she receives outpatient intervention. They could make an agreement that she's not alone with the baby (he does all the wake ups, there's a nanny, or a relative if she's not there with specific instructions on what to do if a situation escalates). I'd also let him know that you know this is hard, and that you'll support him however you can, but that if he can't take one of those steps you need to involve CPS.

Anonymous
Post 05/16/2014 19:37     Subject: SIL hit niece
Baby could die from a head injury.

Are you in a position to care for the child?
Anonymous
Post 05/16/2014 19:35     Subject: SIL hit niece
I'd call CPS. Slapping a baby is serious.
Anonymous
Post 05/16/2014 19:34     Subject: SIL hit niece
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Respectfully, this is between SIL and BIL; only your DH is even related to SIL, so let DH handle it. Step back.


Are you out of your mind? The child is NINE MONTHS OLD.

Get off DCUM and report this to CPS. Well first I would tell the husband he has the option to take serious action and if he doesn't, you will call CPS. Then follow through.


Seriously, this is a baby that needs protecting. If her father won't do it, someone should.
Anonymous
Post 05/16/2014 19:33     Subject: SIL hit niece
Anonymous wrote:Respectfully, this is between SIL and BIL; only your DH is even related to SIL, so let DH handle it. Step back.


Are you out of your mind? The child is NINE MONTHS OLD.

Get off DCUM and report this to CPS. Well first I would tell the husband he has the option to take serious action and if he doesn't, you will call CPS. Then follow through.
Anonymous
Post 05/16/2014 19:33     Subject: SIL hit niece
Op here her family does not get along with us or we with her family nor does my SIL like me and my Dh. Her mom tried to encourage her to see a therapist but she refuses.
Anonymous
Post 05/16/2014 19:32     Subject: SIL hit niece
Respectfully, this is between SIL and BIL; only your DH is even related to SIL, so let DH handle it. Step back.
Anonymous
Post 05/16/2014 19:30     Subject: SIL hit niece
If your brother won't do anything, it is time to call CPS. Has your brother reached out to her family? Could they be helpful?
Anonymous
Post 05/16/2014 19:26     Subject: SIL hit niece
My SIL has bee suffering from ppd but refuses to go to therapy or take antidepressants. My BIL called DH today and confided that SIL has repeatedly slapped their 9 month old. BIL does not want to leave her and take the baby. We offered for them to stay with us but he loves her too much even though he saw her abusing the baby. She apologizes profusely after each episode We are worried about the baby and his safety. Would you call CPS if you were us?