Reply to Family blocking help for mother

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "Family blocking help for mother"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
While your intentions are that of a very caring daughter, you do need to think about how things might go on both ends.  Contacting Adult Protective Services sounds like the appropriate first step for your Mom's welfare AND to document the seriousness of the situation for other family members, too.

Key to what you will be able to set up in terms of care for your Mom will be finances, and unless your Mother has income of her own and is still legally married, your Dad would need to be directly involved.   Based upon what APS finds, an initial step might be for you to go out and get your Mom in for a full physical and mental health evaluation with her primary care doctor and a geriatric psychologist for a complete level of function evaluation.  This will let everyone know how your Mom is doing healthwise.  Before such a trip, it you could also research agencies which provide in-home services to get an idea of the ones which provide the services your Mom might need and the cost range.  It would seem that as a first step, in-home supports might be set up to see how she does with that step and appropriate medical care.

If you find little "sustained" family interest in overseeing your Mom's continued care with in-home or facility based care, then this would give you time to set up the legal and financial tools to bring your Mom to your area.  With her still being legally married and an aunt having POA, it sounds like this could be tricky and take time.....And realize that on your end you do need to d do some research on line to see what assisted living facilities there are in her area, what range of services do they offer (assisted and memory care), do they have an opening, what is involved in someone applying, is there an entry fee, what is the monthly base fee as well as added levels of care etc.  THEN do the same research on your end as you do not just bring a person anywhere.

[/quote]

This isn't exactly correct as we are going through it.  A lot of nursing homes, especially on medicaid or any other services will not allow you to get any type of help, until mom is living here.  We have been doing this now.  If your family has private funds to pay, then it will be much easier.  If not, it is not an easy process.  The POA and being married if they are not doing anything is not a big deal.  Someone else has POA on our family member.  We consider it void and do not use it.  Adult protective services will only get involved in very bad situations.  If she is being minimally maintained, they will not help.  We called APS in CA many times and they did nothing even when our family member was being taken advantage of and had nothing but the clothing on her back.  We had to advocate very hard to get any help here and even so it is minimal.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics