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[quote=Anonymous]My mom lives far away. She is in some sort of decline and has been for awhile. She is basically on her own except for bills being taken care of (somewhat as I have had to step in on more than one occasion) by my father. Parents live apart but neither considers themselves apart. I realize this is crazy and it is but it is a religion thing too long for a thread. My mom has a few friends around who say she is fine as well as her sister. They call her an eccentric. I know better. She is soooo thin and just not right. Father just doesn't want to deal and he has moved on with another relationship. I go to the house and it is a mess and she is a mess and has bursts of anger etc. I cannot have my kids there and as they get older I can't just jump on a plane as I had in the past. My brothers are useless and say leave it alone. I feel horrible guilt. What would I like to do. I would like to move her here and get her in a facility that she has  some independence but I know someone is there. I can't have her at my house to live with her tantrums, not fair to husband and kids etc. I would like for her to be part of something and fun things to do and be around people who aren't using her. She is famous for taking people out and buying things etc. and this includes her sister who is a widow and is all around a nasty person. Her sister is now her power of attorney as in a fight she took my dad off. I am tempted to call a welfare type agency but I also wonder if this would inflame things. Part of me just wants to run from the whole thing but I don't think this is right. I don't even want to argue with my dad because I  am sure he has caregiver fatigue coupled with just wanting to pretend there is nothing wrong so he can pursue his other life. I am sure I am not the only person who has been in this situation and I am wondering how best to navigate. My intention is not to argue with anyone, even my dad/aunt etc. I just want my mom to get some help. I believe some medicine could calm her down, she needs to be in a sanitary situation and she should be enjoying this phase of her life. This is also not about money, I am not trying to oversee her for some sort of future inheritance. Frankly I have a lot more than either of my parents. Anyway, advice would be helpful. I talked to her this morning and I was worried, really worried.[/quote]

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