Reply to standards for toddler behavior at a library?

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, you sound like a great parent and not like one of “those moms” at all. Actually, I think the fact that you are aware enough and care enough to ask this question shows that you will not turn into one of  “those moms”. Everything you’re doing sounds fine, toddlers with appropriate caregiver supervision have always seemed welcome in the library children’s rooms I’ve been to.

Since you asked about expectations, I’ll share my family’s library rules for the toddler/preschool set. They don’t always meet all of the expectations, so plenty of trips have been cut short by inappropriate behavior, but here’s what we try for.

[u]Children’s room:[/u]
-	We use quiet indoor voices (modeled at home frequently and on the way to the library)
-	We use walking feet. 
-	Be kind and gentle (aka no hogging all the crayons or shoving the other kid who just took the puzzle you wanted)
-	You may play with the toys/crayons/puzzles, one at a time. Remember to put one toy away before you get out the next thing.
-	You can get any board book off of the shelf, but only one at a time. When you are done with a book, give it to mommy so I can take care of it (decide to check it out for her if she really liked it or put it on the cart to be reshelved)

I let her “wander freely” around the children’s room – meaning that she can decide where in that room she is and she doesn’t have to stay right beside me – but I make sure she’s always where I can see her so that I can ensure that she’s following the above expectations and redirect if needed.

[u]Main library (teen/adult/DVD section/etc.):[/u]
-	We use whisper voices (quieter than children’s room voice, also modeled and reminded)
-	We use walking feet.
-	Only touch things on the shelves when mommy says OK. The things in this part of the library are for big kids and grownups.
-	Stay right beside mommy.

When I go to the library with toddlers, I make an extremely quick sweep through this section. I go online to the library catalogue the night before and make a list of the books I want to grab and their call numbers, and then I just do a quick run through the main library to get what I’ve already picked. I figure I have a window of about 10 minutes before the 2yo begins slipping up on regulating her volume and keeping her hands to herself. She likes the DVD section, so if we’re picking some of those that week I usually have a few additional minutes of good behavior there before she needs redirection and either a return to the children’s room or a quick exit and return home.
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