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[quote=Anonymous]OP here.  Sorry, I should clarify.  DH is from an abusive birth family and old habits do not die hard - they don't even die.  Should I just step in and rent a suite for our nuclear family somewhere?

I know this create a HUGE to do - spoken or unspoken.  But I just don't see putting up with the elephant in the room, so to speak.  They are GREAT at deflecting.

DH wants to suck it up, as part of his abused past.   Right now, our kids don't want to go, understandably, which may be the vote we need.  They did not really get to sleep well all week, which was no vacation for them (4 grown people in a  queen bed?  Really?)

If they do go, it is because their friends are there the same week, and they want to see them on vacation.  Last year, their friends took them in a few nights, but it is their vacation too.  I really would not expect acquaintances to be more generous and thoughtful than blood!

It feels like they don't want us there.  I just don't want my kids to get that message, for obvious reasons.  What kind of people are these?  Wow.

I hate the thought of spending vacation this way.  i am trying to do the right thing, but I'm damned if I do and damned if I don't.  This is not the first time with this group.  As if they enjoy having more "victims".  I certainly do not want my kids to play a part.

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