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[quote=Anonymous]I am a young, stay at home mother of four children. When I say young, I am in my mid-twenties and my husband will turn 30 this upcoming year. I am a full time college student and DH has a very stressful job that requires long hours, time away from home and comes with an extensive amount of stress and is physically exhausting. We have been married for almost 10 years.

Before the kids and our wedding, we were so in love. I'm talking rip-your-clothes-off love and everyone could see how happy we were. After 10 years, the honeymoon is definitely over and real, hard, overwhelming life has taken over. Add in raising children and we're both pretty much spent. I have taken on all household responsibilities (cleaning, laundry, cooking, grocery shopping, bills/budgeting, even yard work) and my husbands job is to provide. Even though we both work so hard at our jobs (I call being a SAHM a job because it is the hardest thing I have ever done!), we could benefit from putting forth more effort towards our relationship with one another.

I have heard many, many times that having young children is the most difficult time and that we just have to weather the storm. When I see successful marriages that have lasted for 40 some years, I wonder what the golden ticket to getting there would be. I love my husband. I understand that he is worn out and probably isn't meaning to neglect my needs but at the end of the day (after being AT work more than he is home) he has nothing left to give. For those who want to know and think it is important, I do give in to his sexual needs and we are affectionate. I guess I am just missing the connection. The connection of something other than, "Did you pay XYZ?" "I need to get this for the kids" "Oh, you have to work late and won't be home for dinner?"....you know the "business" of a marriage/family.

Advice from any of you wise DCUM members with successful, happy marriages? [/quote]

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