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[quote=Anonymous]Exactly that way. Why would you *not* say that out loud. "MIL, we love our Christmas visits to your home. However, last year's visit was unbearable as a result of BIL's instability. I understand that he is your son and that you want the best for him and believe the best of him, but I feel the same about my own children and it isn't healthy or safe for them to be around such an unstable and volatile adult. For this reason, we will not make our travel plans to visit you unless and until we know that BIL will not be staying with you at the same time. If you decline to inform us of his travel plans or are upset with us for feeling this way and don't want us to visit, we totally understand, just let us know and we will make alternate plans for the holiday." [/quote]
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