Reply to My brother confided in my husand that he is having an affair!

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[quote=Anonymous]I don't know if the wife is truly a pain in the ass or if it's simply a case of her "not being one of us."

And let's face it -- there's a lot of people out there that are just high needs. The woman who's bossing her husband around all the time, the woman who can't shut up, the man who can't pick up after himself, the man who gets grumpy for any or no reason ...

Either OP's brother:
1) lives on in quiet desperation
2) tries to make the marriage work
3) has an affair 
4) leaves the marriage

I'm guessing (2) has been tried numerous times, and if they've had lots of issues over the course of 18 years, it hasn't worked or hasn't been done well. And -- you can only make the marriage work if both people want to make it work.

Steeling yourself to (1) can work if the wife is the sort that will at least let you sit downstairs and play video games, go out for a beer, etc. -- i.e. some outlet that doesn't involve being tied to her.

And of course he's going to have feelings for the affair girl. She doesn't have to do the hard work of marriage -- just the fun bits. [/quote]

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