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[quote=Anonymous]

Another vote for "PLEASE don't try to make it about you, like my selfish, bitter MIL".

Trust me - when it is someone else's day, it is their day, and no one else's.  If you try to make it about you, even if you pretend you are not, *everyone* will remember that you were the selfish and bitter one.

They will think that your child birth experiences (in this case - but also applies to wedding, first house, et al) were awful and you are so bitter about them you don't know how to cope, let go, be selfless, NOT act out, keep things in perspective and be appropriate.  And they will wonder how you ever got anything done yourself.  And how you tie your own shoes every day.

Show them you are a loving, understanding, kind, selfless and decent human being and grandmother.  They will want you around much more!

If you truly mean to "help", you will respect the new mom and the new family's wishes.

My MIL was not a very good mom (according to her kids) and not a very good grandmother.  She really just wants bragging rights amongst her bridge friends.  But she is very mean, snarky and critical.  I have never heard her say anything nice about anyone I actually know.  It says far more about her than anyone else!

I can't say this enough: It is definitely NOT about you.

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