Reply to Mother's Day gift for a non-mom grandma???

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[quote=Anonymous]Here's the backstory.  My father's wife does not have any children of her own.  She married my dad when we were adults (youngest sibling was 24)  We don't even refer to her as step-mom - it's just too weird.   She's our father's wife.  I like her enough.  She's great, nice, everything is fine.  We have children now and she is wonderful with our kids (more than even my mom - who "tolerates" the toddlers but has never offered to take the kids on her own - unlike my dad's wife).

The kids call dad's wife grandma and spend a lot of time with her.  when my son was born, my dad made a big deal about mother's day and insisted we do something for his wife - since she's his grandma.  (as a backstory, my brother refused with his kids saying she is not his mother and the kids will recognize her on "grandparents day" but not mother's day and there was a huge fight leading to them not speaking for about 2 years).  So, when my son was born, we gave a gift and card that said "happy mother's day, grandma"  and this has gone on for about 4 years (we now have 2 kids).

for some reason, this year it's sitting really weird with me.  I now get my brother's position.  This woman is not my mother, and we don't do "happy mother's day, grandma" from the kids to my own mother, or DH's mother.  (We do a Happy mother's day from us - their kids - but not from their grandkids.  So this year, for whatever reason, I feel really fake and weird giving this woman a mother's day wish from people that aren't her children.

Anyone have any thoughts?  [/quote]

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