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[quote=Anonymous]I just found emails between my husband and another woman.  They weren't explicit but did reference "having good memories", that she is not wearing any pink today, and that she thinks of him whenever she wears her red shoes.  I snooped on his iPhone, so I wasn't able to go back further and read older messages.  Should I ask him who she is?  This would be admitting that I snooped through his phone and set me up for a big fight if there is a reasonable explanation for the emails.  DH travels a lot for work and has a history of not telling me very much about who he's with, what he does, etc.

However--and please no snark about this--he also is an admitted cheater.  About a year and a half ago, he told me that he had had sex with one or two women he'd picked up at bars while on a work trip.  I was very hurt and disgusted by it, but did not leave and the relationship has mostly been working.  We have been together since college, married 12 years and have two kids if that's any explanation for why I didn't leave.  I guess I'm asking for advice about this because I know that part of the deal with not leaving after being cheated on was that I am supposed to be trusting him and checking his email and being freaked out by emails like this show that I'm not keeping my part of the bargain.[/quote]

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