Reply to Friend does not discipline her child and it's no longer fun hanging out with them -- what to do?

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Reply to "Friend does not discipline her child and it's no longer fun hanging out with them -- what to do?"

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, I think it will be hard to keep this friendship.

If you want to try, I think you need to introduce Amy and her daughter to the concept of "House Rules".  That means, her daughter can't play with your fridge door because that's your house rule.   Even if she does it at school, or whatever.  It's OK that her daughter is confused, but you need Amy to support you in your house rules.

It would also help to not have play dates in your homes, but to get the kids together in a neutral space, preferably one without a lot of toys, but more like a gymnastics place.   Your daughter will have to learn that not all kids share toys as she is being told to, and that will stink, but that is her lesson to learn.   "We do it this way.   Other people have different ways, but we stick with our way."

You can head off some of this over time -- when the kids play together you may need to educate both Amy and her child.   "Now, Samantha really likes playing with her pail, so she doesn't want to share it with anyone, unless she is sure she'll get it back.  So Amy, this pail is for you, and this pail is for Samantha."  And don't let Amy take Samantha's pail, unless she is willing to "practice" sharing (because Samantha is so fond of this pail.)  You can't do this for everything, but it could be a start.

If Amy gets in a huff because of this, well, at least you tried.[/quote]

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