Reply to Raising a child without a father

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[quote=Anonymous]Not saying this applies to you, but this is what I feel is important:

Don't have dysfunctional romantic relationships yourself.  Keep your romantic relationships away from your kid until they are very serious.  It's better for your child to see you alone, without a man, then to see you act out unhealthy patterns.  Kids internalize what they see and tend to repeat it as an adult.

Agree with good, positive male role models.

I came from a very dysfunctional household.  I focus a lot of my parenting on fostering resilience in my child.  Problem solving and resilience help lead to a true, enduring self-esteem.  Unlike just telling a kid he or she is great, good job, what have you.   I think self esteem is critical for everyone, but even moreso for a girl with a bad role model father, or an absent father.  There are myriad reasons the father may be absent, but the one the kid will take to heart is a feeling of not being good enough to earn his love.   Don't let her go out there thinking she has to earn men's love.

It's tough, but it can be done.  GL. [/quote]

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