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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My 13 yo has ADHD, is on meds, has a 504 plan, works with a math tutor, and works with a therapist on social emotional challenges. Our goal for middle school is to help DS develop study habits and routines now and gradually become more independent. I am not sure that he's making progress on study and school habits, it feels like things mostly get done because I pass along email reminders from teachers about assignments and he often retakes tests to get better grades.

I've read other posts about EF coaches and may look into that. But I'd love to hear from other parents about what has helped make a difference. The hardest part to me is that DS seems content to do the bare minimum, he won't take notes in class, and he refuses to go through and organize his binder (e.g., keep papers for each class in a separate section), even when I sit down with him to do so. It's been very difficult to get him to spend 15-30 min on weekdays checking Canvas or to study for weekly Spanish quizzes, though sometimes it helps if I sit nearby and do my own work. He still gets a mix of Bs and As with minimal effort but I know this will change as he gets older.

We will continue to scaffold and provide support about how to manage the work and break things down into smaller parts. But I worry that at the end of the day, he is content to stick with bare minimum and will resist any coaching or support.

Anyone else figure out how to overcome this and encourage kid to develop more internal motivation? I've read Self-Driven Child but haven't found it to be helpful in our case.[/quote]

I understand what you’re going through. My daughter is the same way. It’s so frustrating for us both! I book I read that I found helpful is “No-Drama Discipline” by D. Siegel. Some parts of it I found quite helpful. We also started using an EF coach like you mentioned too. Someone on here recommended them (thank you to whoever that person was!). It’s been a big help and we’ve seen progress! The coach has been able to get my daughter to commit to things I couldn’t and holds her accountable which is a good. I wasn’t able to without being the bad guy! :( It’s great having someone in-between that understands the behaviors and can help mediate. It’s made things less stressful around our house too! Hope that helps. Good luck!  [/quote]

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