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[quote=Anonymous]I'll get flamed for this, but I parent like we're friends.

I didn't have kids so I could yell and boss someone around. I had kids because I thought it would be fun to have some buddies with me while we went around doing cool stuff.

Any time they have a tantrum, it's usually because they want something and don't know how to get it. So I just teach them how to. Don't want the spaghetti I made for dinner? No problem, I can teach you how to make a sandwich or Mac & cheese, and you can make it for yourself. If they don't want to make it, then they just eat whatever I made.

FWIW I was raised by a parenting coach who was on the authoritative (not authoritarian) side of things, and I honestly don't think it made any difference in my outcome. I was always headstrong and just did whatever I wanted anyway. And my siblings and I all had very different life outcomes despite being raised by the same parents. So I just don't stress over it and try to just have fun with parenting.

Some of our best memories have been made this way. I remember over the summer, my 9yo had a sudden meltdown around 9pm. So I packed her up and took her to the carnival that was in town. It cheered her up and ended up being one of our favorite memories. Would yelling at her to stop have done anything? Probably not. Is she going to look back in 20 years and thin "I'm really glad mom disciplined me?" Nope.

No real behavior issues with them. They help clean, they turn off the screens when it's time, they do well in school. [/quote]

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