Reply to Need advice about serious issues in a private boarding school (New York). We are new to the US and don’t know what to do

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Reply to "Need advice about serious issues in a private boarding school (New York). We are new to the US and don’t know what to do"

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[quote=Anonymous]a few thoughts:

Medical leaves are common for any health or mental health issue.  My son's school recommends 2 weeks.  an infected ingrown toenail is tricky because while it isn't serious it sounds like it needs regular medical attention and he needs to see specialists.  I would probably take him out for a week to address this.

The secret zoom called is embarrassing and unacceptable.... and maybe a window into the types of people in charge at the school.  They should be professional.  If you're going to keep your kid at the school then I would address this and let them know it's not acceptable.  If you are planning on moving him to another school then this is a good reason....You could leverage this.

They should move your son to another room or switch the roommate.  From my understanding it has to be reported several times for schools to make a change because a lot of disagreements are normal and part of the adjustment phase.  This doesnt sound like the case for your son and I would demand they move him.  Your son needs to feel safe.  It also sounds like he could use some counseling for this and maybe other issues.  The school should have someone that he can talk to who will support him.

The public humiliation by the teacher.  You should ask the administration some questions.  Is it possible there was a misunderstanding?  He said something inappropriate but it was unintentional.  He clearly is confused by the situation so it should be addressed and again perhaps a counselor or therapist could help.

The safety issue isn't  a big deal or that unusual.  The doors are locked and you need a key to enter the buildings.   The kids are in high school so if they are willing to go somewhere with a stranger then boarding school is not the right fit.  You must have approved a leave request for the weekend??  At my son's school they can not leave without parent permission however they do not necessarily pay attention to the time or have someone to check them out.  I think plans and times change frequently, especially if parents are traveling so they are flexible with this.

I would probably reach out to an educational consultant ( someone reputable) and work on finding the right fit for him. These consultants are experienced and know all the schools.  Some schools are better with international students than other schools.  They will help you with the recommendation letters because they have relationships.   I don't think getting a lawyer involved is worth the time or money.  I would focus on finding the right fit and it doesn't sound like this school is it.  However see how your son feels because maybe there are things they can do to help him and it sounds like he needs more support. [/quote]

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