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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]The best book i've read on it (and sadly i've read many) is Stop Caretaking the Borderline or Narcissist

It really changed my life in terms of stopping the cycle of expecting reasonable behavior out of them and also being able to see their actions more objectively and not get emotionally caught up in it [/quote]

I will read this. I am still in the emotionally caught up phase and take the bait too often-getting mad at their repeating false memories and madder still when telling in front of others that believe it. If only socially acceptable to hold up sign that says, “that’s not true but they have BPD so they think it is.”
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I'm 15:58 and the false memories is a really difficult thing because you start to think you are the one who is remembering things incorrectly. I am in the process of documentation and discovery for a divorce and it has been both validating and traumatic to pull old emails and be able to dig up old records and realize that the things that happened that later my spouse told me didn't happen actually did happen and I have actual records to show it. It's very confusing to be living intimately within this and very hard to get out, because most people on the outside don't see it.

It was hard for me to start talking about it to people because people thought of my spouse as the good one and the nice one but only knew them superficially. But OP, I want you to know that people have been supportive and kind and have taken care of me and my children. I hope you can find a way through this.[/quote]

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