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Kids With Special Needs and Disabilities
Reply to "Birthdays are so hard in a house of neurodivergents"
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[quote=Anonymous]It does sound like you're doing too much. If they're going to be disappointed either way, then why wear yourselves out? It sounds like you're expecting (or trying to basically purchase through gifts and effort) a performance of happiness and gratitude, while your children also tolerate deviation from routine and unusual foods, changes to decor, as well as dysregulated adults. You're combining deviation from routine with increased social expectations and those things don't go well together. When things are less "special" there's less pressure on them to be on special occasion behavior. You're the adult and you can make the change. Tell them they can pick a present in advance, no surprises. Stop decorating so much and make the food mostly normal. Ask yourself what the kids actually do well with, rather than what you think a family should do. Give them what works for them.[/quote]
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