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[quote=Anonymous]I'm sorry that's the case for you. My family is toxic and dysfunctional. My therapist suggested I spend time with only the people I want to. That helped me drop the rope on organizing big family holiday events. Two of my family members are personality disordered so there is a lot of gaslighting, projection (accusing me of what they do or have done), manipulation, and yelling/screaming when they can't control their emotions. At some point, I had to accept that was the hand I was dealt. I've done therapy and have done writing (proven to help with your health). Recently, I decided to go low contact with the toxic sibling and my whole life is better. I wasted way too much time trying to defend myself, understand the craziness, calm the person down, help with their "trauma" and so on. I also read about Karpman's Triangle, and I decided to remove myself from that victim-rescuer-perpetrator dynamic. I also decided I would not be passing this toxicity on to my children. I apologize when I mess up. I show up for their events and care about them. I listen to what they have to say. I ask permission before giving advice. I am there for them emotionally. [/quote]
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