Reply to Did anyone realize that they don't really like their parents all that much?

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "Did anyone realize that they don't really like their parents all that much?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]OP, I could have written a lot of what you wrote. My parents, also immigrants, certainly experienced trauma in their upbringing (poverty, single parent/raised by grandparent, abuse etc) and I realize how that stunted their emotional maturity. It doesn't make their behaviors any less frustrating, though!

In my case, I realize that my parents are pretty self-centered and black-and-white thinkers. They're extremely fundamentally religious and judgmental. There's no room for nuance beyond what they believe. They are only interested in me as a person insofar as I conform to their views. My father is also a mentally ill hoarder with toxic traits but that's another story.

They made poor financial decisions their entire adult lives, with consequences such as our family being homeless for a time when I was a child. They are now in their mid-60s and separated, but my mom is currently very financially dependent on me and DH  (while still doling out unsolicited advice constantly!).  That has caused some resentment.

For me, this combination of factors has made me realize that while there's love and some good memories, and I appreciate that they instilled a love of learning in me, my relationship with my parents will never be close as they were/are unable to fulfill the needs of emotional and physical security.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics