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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I’ll try but I really do believe some of it is luck. Two boys. Dh and I had/have a good marriage so that is lucky and important.

I was sah, went pt, then almost ft about 6 and 8 th grade. So, they saw  a team where both parents worked and respected each other. They both comment now on how they appreciate having a strong mother who worked. To be honest that surprised me.

They were expected  to clear the table, empty the dishwasher, make bed, fold laundry, and other tasks.

We had family time but also encouraged them to be outside playing with friends. We did not need to constantly be with them as so many do today.

If they signed up for something they had to finish unless truly a bad fit. I was involved at school and we absolutely respected the teacher’s rules.

In hs, they had pt jobs on weekends and summers.One studied abroad in hs.

We talked at the dinner table. We cooked together and had them cook for us.

They absolutely had struggles, and we had frustrations with them, but overall just normal adolescence. One labeled gifted and one average.

What I feel/think/ see is so many people feel they have to do everything for their children, be with them constantly, and believe they are all extraordinary.

Most humans are average - whether it’s sports, music, arts, academics. Each person will shine for a bit - don’t make it more than it is. Follow their lead.

Have family time but let your children have a life, make sure they pack their lunch, make their bed, etc.

Talk at dinner, listen to them, have them spend time with grandparents or older people. Travel if even just to neighboring states. Go to events and museums in DC. Be involved in their thing in terms of supporting it but not overtaking it.

One graduated university and one will graduate in May. Both in 4 years. A lot of luck, and some just normal practical expectations I think built character and appreciation that sometimes get forgotten in the stress  of modern parenting.

Thanks for sharing!

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