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[quote=Anonymous]This is the first year my mom won’t be coming to Thanksgiving.  She’s in memory care and thriving there but change and new things and plans are so incredibly stressful for her.  Last Thanksgiving was her last real holiday out and it was so awful for her.  She was so stressed out in advance that she didn’t sleep for a few days before.  The day of she sat in a chair looking terrified as she tried to make small talk with my husband’s family who has known her for years and adores her.  She was so uncomfortable and by the time we left she fell apart in the car on the way back.  It took several days for her to recover as she was exhausted.

This year her memory care is hosting a Thanksgiving dinner today and I’m telling her that we’re all coming there to celebrate Thanksgiving with her.  I haven’t said a word about actual Thanksgiving and thankfully, so far at least, she hasn’t expressed any disappointment to not be going out for Thanksgiving or being with the rest of my husband’s family (she and I are all that’s left locally of our own family).  I think if she catches on that it’s tomorrow and mentions it I may just lie and tell her I have to work.

I love her so much and feel so bad about this but it really is just so hard on her these days.  There is no looking forward to anything, future plans only cause stress and anxiety for her.  But this part of it is so hard.  [/quote]

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