Reply to My husband gas lights non stop. Anytime I try to discuss something that bothers me, he denies he did X Y Z

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Reply to "My husband gas lights non stop. Anytime I try to discuss something that bothers me, he denies he did X Y Z"

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[quote=Anonymous]My husband blindsided me with a separation 5 weeks ago. I thought I was devastated, and yes there's a lot of change and grief and some trauma to process.

But now I realize that I never felt at peace in my own home. My stbx is a perpetual victim. He projected his worst traits onto me. I had to choose my battles very wisely when it came to advocating for myself, because he would act like me having opinions and dreams was an affront to him.

I always assumed positive intent, and tried to give him grace, and explained what I needed calmly, and I thought my life was OK. But now I realize, no, it wasn't. It was terrible for my mental health. This was a blessing in disguise.

OP, your husband treating you like this isn't OK. People have insecurities . . . it doesn't mean they get to lie and project and gaslight. This isn't just some small character flaw. This is psychological warfare. And probably the only way to make it stop is to leave. I'm sorry; I know how daunting that seems. But I hope you will consider it.[/quote]

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