Reply to Why would a mother not call her grown children?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm not sure about years, but my MIL waits until DH texts/calls her. She will never be the first one to reach out. She just gets pissier (sp?) and pissier about it lol. 
[/quote]

I've seen this before it makes no sense. Is this some form of a "test" from a total narcissist? I wish someone could explain this to me...[/quote]

I think my MIL has some narcissistic tendencies, but isn't a total narcissist. It's more that she saw her mother always have to be the one to reach out to the grandparents. And then when MIL was a young parent, the expectation was communicated very clearly that she had to do all the work of maintaining a relationship. Patterns repeating themselves and all that. So MIL expected that once her children were grown they would bear the burden of managing the relationship. Except they don't, and then MIL has these absolute hissy fits because her kids are conforming to how she imagined things would go. And her adult children just roll their eyes and say "The phone works both ways, Mom."[/quote]

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