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Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
Reply to "Mine and My DH's sex life sucks"
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[quote=Anonymous]Maybe trade off initiating and make an explicit agreement that that's what you want to do. Once a spouse initiates, the other spouse has 7 days (or whatever) to initiate. Maybe come up with a "shot down" contingency -- you don't want a spouse to feel obligated to have sex RIGHT NOW just because the other one tried to initiate; but you want to have something in place to ease the pain of rejection when that happens. Maybe the rejecting spouse has to initiate (or give oral sex or whatever) within 48 hours? Just some ideas. For me, as the high libido spouse, I don't actually mind going a little longer without sex as long as I know it's somewhere on my spouse's radar as something she wants to do. Where I get pissed off is where she says "not now, later." And "later" NEVER HAPPENS. My ego gets really small, really quick when I try to initiate a couple of times in a row; I get stiff armed; and she just kind of "forgets" about sex. [/quote]
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